Kimo’s Vegas

Britney Spears. Photo from Kimo Akane

WELCOME TO Kimo’s Vegas … the Player’s Edge!

BRITNEY SPEARS IS rumored to be negotiating a Las Vegas residency at Caesars that could pay her Celine Dion-like coin – more than $100 million. She’s got the hits and theatrics to back up a Vegas-style jackpot.

LAST WEEK Las Vegas hosted the Adult Entertainment Expo, and the Adult Video Awards, which is considered by the industry to be the Oscars of porn – much to the chagrin of the folks in the real Academy. Asa Akira, the actress (some debate that’s a stretch of the term), holds the record for winning the most awards in a year, two years in a row, will host this year. In an interview with Robin Leach, she said her biggest concern was what to wear … She was being facetious, right?

THESE DAYS, just about everyone knows someone who has lost or had their iPhone stolen. However, Wayne Dobson of Las Vegas knows more people than most of us. In fact, people in search of their beloved cells knock on his door 24/7. He’s been accused of stealing or finding people’s phones so often that he’s posted a sign that says “No lost cell phones.” The culprit is the inaccuracy of the phones’ GPS or, more precisely, how the phone triangulates its location … Maybe that’s why the “find my iPhone” app is free.

EVERY YEAR the readers of vote on the best and worst the city has to offer. This year the Trippy for the Best Downtown goes to the Golden Nugget. But one of the site’s best quips goes to Downtown’s worst, the Vegas Club. Editors say it’s “the closest we’ve ever come to the theme of Baseball Funeral Home.” Readers and editors agree that the best place to play video poker is “the D” … While you’re there, check out the carpet they voted the best in the city (guess I’m not the only one who looks down) … And look for owner Derek Stevens, whom its readers selected as Vegas Person of the Year.

IF YOU POWER-POUND energy drinks to maximize your casino awake time but the opu craves something solid, try a Wired Waffle. It’s the phalanges food that you can eat with one hand while hitting the max-bet button with the other – a waffle infused with cinnamon, bacon and maple syrup flavors and a ton of caffeine for extended uptime. Check them out online at

PERHAPS YOU LIKE your bacon with a little more kick … Try the bar in the Encore called VDKA. There’s the Applewood bacon-infused Crown Royal Maple Whisky, the Sapling Vermont Maple Liqueur that’s topped with a freshly cooked slice, or the Bacon & Maple that’s made with Bakon Vodka. Or, if you have really expensive tastes and black-colored plastic, “try order” a shot of “elit Pristine Waters” for $250. Anyone who’s seen a beer commercial will tell you it’s all about the H2O, and the source of this high-grade Stoli starts as snowmelt that is naturally filtered through a Himalayan rock reservoir in Nepal nearly 10,000 feet above sea level …

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